Mr. Crawler, you are a stranger to me now.

So a friend of mine was off finishing the new quest achievements when he stumbled across a bunch of crabs who had a fancy for Silversnap Ice.

http://www.wowhead.com/item=61356

lol, when he linked me that I knew this crab was on the next level. What else could be responsible for such an ingenious tactic besides millions of years of evolution? I flew out right away and when I arrived it was even better than I expected. The crab is the same skin as my normal crab, only it's chill enough to carry around an ice cold brew with him into the heat of battle. I was in love.
I knew it was a special love, I wanted to take it slow. We spent days on end together. Taking long walks on the beach, cooking our favorite meals by the campfire, sharing secrets.

http://img638.imageshack.us/img638/8067/nihonnedward.jpg

When the moment felt right, I asked if he wanted to be my companion.
We made sweet love in the way only a crab and a nelf could.

For obvious reasons I'm leaving out the screenshot. I encourage the use of your imagination.

When the bond was unbreakable, I noticed something different about him. He had changed his ways. Duct tape no longer held that ice cold brew gallantly to his claw. Its like our companionship had made him forget who he was.
I wondered for a moment if it was my fault. . . No.
"You are a stranger to me now." I told him, and hearthed away, heartbroken. :'(
Before I vanished he said, "るるるるるっるるるっるるるるうるるるううううーー."
"What do you mean by them?"
"るううううううるるうるるるうるるうるあうらううっるうるろふぉ！”
"I don't know if I believe in such strange things, but I will tell them our story!"

So here I am now, on an astral out of body voyage into the vast nether some people call... the interwebz. I plead, return my love to his former self, with me!!
Should have kept him for his bilingual skills.